My days fighting with Cushing's Disease
My online dairy to tell you my days fighting with rare disease which is Cushing's,kind of pituitary gland tumor.
Friday 8 November 2019
Diagnosed with Cyclical Cushing's for My Recurrence
I started Ketoconazole in May 2018 and then my endocrinologist ordered low dose dexamethasone supression test to check the cortisol level. This is a special test to confirm how much of my cortisol.I took 1mg dexamethasone pill at 11pm and then take the blood test next day 8am.
Low dose dexamethasone supression test
Dexamethasone is a man-made (synthetic) steroid that is similar to cortisol. It reduces ACTH release in normal people. Therefore, taking dexamethasone should reduce ACTH level and lead to a decreased cortisol level.
I reviewed with my endocrinologist as usual and was thinking my dexa test won't be abnormal. As usual, i opened up doctor room door, sit down and waiting for him to check in system for the blood test result. I asked him, doctor, is my result normal ah? He looked at me and said : Nope wor.
I was surprised as i told the small tumor will not be naughty yet. My dexa test reading was 200++ whereby normal people should not exceed 50. My previous dexa test only 55 and it's a big difference. He said i might having cyclical Cushing's 😢 which is more tricky.
Cyclic Cushing's
is a rare disorder, characterized by repeated episodes of cortisol excess interspersed by periods of normal cortisol secretion. The so-called cycles of hypercortisolism can occur regularly or irregularly with intercyclic phases ranging from days to years.
Yes, seem like my cortisol hormone riding roller coaster and nobody to ensure when is high and when is low. Cushing's is complicated and now some more Cyclical Cushing's...I was thinking myself really rare enough!!!
Thus, my endo prescribed me Ketoconazole again.... I walked out clinic and really felt tired with all of these....As usual, it is very long long queue to get medicine. After done, I sit down on the chair at main lobby and saw my endo. He called my name and I asked him, Dr Alex, can I don't take this medicine ? He said, you see, so many patients in UMMC and they won't arrange operation for you so fast....I fully understand that government hospital must be waiting long time.
💜💛💚💙💚💛💜💛💚💙💚💜💛💟💟💕💙💚💜💛💛💚💙💚💜💟💕💙💚
Somehow may be i should think in positive way when I'm in bad situation. At least I was able to capture the high cortisol blood test result and it's an answer for me & my doctor. One thing which I cannot escape is the review with my endo.
💜💛💚💙💚💛💜💛💚💙💚💜💛💟💟💕💙💚💜💛💛💚💙💚💜💟💕💙💚
Sunday 22 September 2019
开始一切的检查的日子
May 2018 - MRI scan @ Gleneagles : 没发现
Oct 2018 - MRI scan @ UMMC : 0.7mm
Nov 2019 - MRI scan @ ANOC : 没发现
每3个月我都回去复诊。是很累,可是可以怎么样?
Sunday 19 August 2018
再次开始我去医院的日子
四月份里头,我再次带着紧张的心情回去医院,带着我的报告。我知道未必会是好消息。带着不安又紧张的心情。医生安排了我去做了MRI Scan.
在五月份里头,我独自去做了scan. 其实心里还是抱着希望去做,希望并没有tumor 的存在。换上衣服,医生问了几句,我就开始scan了。过程大概30分钟。
完成了scan后,我打算去clinic找医生问看是否可以更改我下次的appointment. 打开门,看见医生脸色,好像好严肃,和他说更改日期后我就离开了。过后,护士在后方叫着我的名字。吩咐我登记见医生。此刻的我好紧张,到底医生怎么会要求见我。
等待了一会儿,终于轮到我了,一进去医生的房间,我看见医生在看着电脑荧幕的严肃表情,我的心跳得好快。终于医生说话了,真的有一粒小颗东西。当时的我不懂如何接受,毕竟我还是正面看待。我忍不住流下眼泪。医生握住我的手,说为什么你哭?我很感动因为他不只是看病的医生而且还安抚病人的一位医生。我对他的第一印象也改变了。以前我觉得他是个很cool 很严肃的医生,话不多说,现在我觉得他是一位那么暖心的医生❤️
他写了一封信给我,说需要见脑科医生。他也不忘安慰我说,你回去冲个凉,吃个饭,看看Facebook 再想想怎样。
和3年前一样,我走出医生门口后,眼泪还是流下来。而且我不懂该如何告知我家人。找了一个角落,我打了一通电话,我知道妈妈一定很担心可是她比我想象中坚强。过后 我还是去了脑科诊所做了预约。
从今天起,一切都改变了,我的心就有着一股压力。。。。
Sunday 12 August 2018
第二个肿瘤的开始
毕竟我还是无法接受3年后的复发。要面对这一切真的不容易 。我都找朋友和去听我喜爱的驻唱歌手唱歌。都有帮助我暂时忘记烦恼。。。
Saturday 4 August 2018
未发现第二个肿瘤之前的日子
Wednesday 25 July 2018
Pictures Before, After & On going (2015 - 2018)
Monday 2 July 2018
第一次手术的日子Days of first operation
是我住进医院的日子,妈妈和舅舅陪我去做手术。服了大概80%的deposit, 等到下午才等到了床位。其实那时候的我感觉就是没有什么准备之下就做手术,我也忘记了当时应该害怕。
我得在ICU度过第一个晚上。那时候我只是感觉到非常的痛,也有呕吐血出来。护士也给我止痛药。护士说,你试看自己拿起食物,我吃了一两口,妈妈就进来了,妈妈喂我吃东西,和我说,要坚强,你看,手术很成功 。我的手术医生第一句话和我说,你看,现在你变漂亮很多了。半夜,我还是一直吐,而且很痛很痛。好不容易才度过第一个晚上,终于我可以回去病房了。
鼻子因为要塞住所以得用嘴巴呼吸,以免细菌感染。记得有一个晚上完全没有入眠,因为感觉好害怕,好没安全感 ,只是用嘴巴呼吸。
医生说可以拆掉尿管,可以下床走动。也把鼻子塞住的东西拔掉。由于很紧,拔的过程很痛很痛。我尝试下床在房间走动,双脚没力,需要慢慢下床。朋友和同事也到来看我。我的空间就只有房间里。而望出去的风景就是KL Tower。不睡觉的时候就坐在沙发上望望窗外的风景。晚上其实也没睡得好,因为感觉很不安也不舒服。可怜的是我妈妈都一直在我身边,半夜拿水给我喝和扶我去厕所。
医生做了一些血液试验。妈妈也觉得安心当我开始慢慢有胃口吃东西。第七天,终于可以出院了。
戴上口罩,一步一步慢慢地步出医院去接德西回家。一路上,好难受,好想吐。因为hormone还未平稳,好不容易从Ampang挨到回PJ. 那感觉的却好痛苦,吐了出来的是青色的液体。我妈妈和舅舅帮忙我收拾房间的东西因为要我回去家乡。那时候的我根本没力气反驳也没心情去想以后的日子应该留在哪里。
我依然时常会有呕吐的时候。其实也没胃口吃东西,睡也无法真正的入眠。还记得那是一种恐怖的感觉,心理上感觉就是无法安心因为有着不舒服的感觉。
✈️